2001-12-11 - F - ing Green Eggs and Ham

Scrambled or Fried?

I am driving home from my exam tonite, my mind off in space, when all of a sudden, *SPLAT*, I have egg all over my windshield. It's pitch black out and I can't see a thing. So, I pull into the gas station to go through the car wash since the wipers only SMEARED it all over the front window and it's now spreading to the side window and it looks like I got sneezed on by a 747 with a major sinus infection. "Car wash temporarily closed." And that's when the apparent case of Tourette's begins. I get out of the car, grab the window washer brush and proceed to WASH the whole front window, side window, and roof of my car with the squeegie brush. You little fuckers. I'm going to fucking kill you. I then get IN the car, SLAM the door (not the best idea since the handle is going to fall off shortly), and turn back AROUND to where those little fuckers hit me. Fuck you. Fuckers. I am swearing out loud what I am going to say to them when I see them. Oooh, you're dead meat little punks. Drive drive drive. Nope. Don't see them. Pull over, turn around. Start driving home. And I lean on the horn. And I mean LEAN. Big long leeeaaaannnn. They are SO lucky I didn't see them because I would have given them a piece of my mind and the feel of my fist. Or at least the look of death. Cause yah, I'm tough like that.