2001-08-20 - Slam Goes The Door Behind Me

Out Of The Blue

I got an email today. Completely unexpected. I’ve been waiting for it for three years.

"I want you to know that I don't hate you & never did & that I never intentionally meant to hurt you."

The email explained nothing. No explanation why one day, three years ago, my "best friend" decided to no longer speak to me. Went away to school and never answered my emails and letters, written to find an explanation. An explanation as to why I deserved to be ignored and seemingly forgotten. Thinking I had done something. Something so bad that I had lost a great friendship over it. Not knowing what I had done killed me inside.

I have recently settled many issues in my life. Resolved conflicts with friends. Rekindled these friendships. Put many things behind me. This was the last "issue" that remained unanswered, one which I had actually given up on this past year. I convinced myself that while it remained unanswered, it was no longer worth worrying about.

While the email today explained nothing, it didn’t have to. She said she just didn’t know what to say and that she was sorry. I’ve been there and I understand. That one sentence above was all I needed to hear. Apology accepted. It’s the last door to close.

It’s all in the past. Right where I want it to be. Never to be thought about again.

*big sigh of relief*...three years in the making. I will sleep well tonite.